So, first, congratulations! You’re off to online dating in 2021. And here's the good news! A friend didn’t set you up on a blind date with little or no information
beside the fact that your date is single. With online dating, you have some information; that is, if you’ve read your date's profile online. Assuming you did, or why else would you be here?
Here are a few tips to get the conversational ball rocking and rolling on your first date. And remember, it’s not a root canal. So reduce the pressure, have fun and chat.
Order an Appetizer
Nothing like talking about food to get the ball rolling. Since most of us love to eat, it can be fun to share an appetizer. Especially an unusual one! (maybe not fish eyeball soup that a recent client was telling me about.)
Read Their Online Dating Profile
That’s an easy starter. He talked about cliff diving in Hawaii. Well, you’re off to a great conversation.
Ask About Outside Work
And we don't mean outdoors, but what do you do when you're not doing your day job. If asked correctly, you don't have to worry about sounding like you're doing an interview. Women, feel free to start first. There’s nothing more attractive than a woman who has a life and is enthusiastic about it. “Besides work, I’m getting my yoga certification just because I love yoga. I probably won’t teach just doing it to delve more into the intricacies of yoga. Then my cousin who lives in England and I are planning a pub-crawling-oyster-eating weekend in Brittany, etc . . .” It shows you have a life, one you like, and if he ends up being the “one” he’s getting the message he will still have a life too – not a needy girlfriend glued to him!
Discuss Vacation Plans
Who doesn’t like to talk about this? One recent female client told me that her date (who is now her boyfriend of 5 months) had walked the Appalachian Trail and now the two of them are getting ready to walk the Camino de Santiago.
Avoid the Exes
Hmmmm, this is an interesting one and it must be said in the right spirit in the right tone. While I work primarily with both male and female clients with online dating, I’ve now heard this conversation starter/stopper from several men and women. Your date brings up an ex. It’s your first date with him. A simple “It's' fun to meet you and I don’t talk about my exes on dates. I remember you mentioned that you are scuba certified . . .” Sweet segue into more positive topics.
So, if your New Year’s Resolution is to meet people and start dating again, online dating has millions of singles – and it only takes one!