1. The Biggest Red Flag in Dating Might Be You Not because you're a bad person.Because self-awareness is rare and most people think they're the exception. Everybody has a list of red flags. Almost nobody has a list of their own. 2. Why Smart People Make Terrible Dating Decisions The more intelligent someone is, the better they become at explaining away obvious problems. Intelligence doesn't protect you from bad choices. It helps you justify them. 3. Your Type Is Probably

Before I get started, I laughed this morning with a client over this. She reading a man's profile where he just wrote 5 adjectives describing himself. That's it. Nothing else. But had 8 great photos. BTW, this client is very funny too. She responded with "You just got a 5 star review from me". Anyway, they have a date with coffee and a walk through Central Park next week. Now, for the real topic: So yesterday morning, Matt, a 58 year old client of mine, sent me th

So every morning, I read The Wall Street Journal and scroll through my 1440 newsletter — because nothing says "good morning" like coffee, headlines and a weirdly perfect dating analogy. And I came across this headline last week: A man jumped out of a plane… free-falling through the sky… and solved a Rubik’s Cube in 23 seconds before his parachute deployed. Excuse me? and you think dating is hard? Meanwhile, half the singles I talk to are emotionally exhausted because someone

Happy Mother’s Day first!!! Here’s a little love-life accounting for the summer ahead. Why am I writing this? Last week I spoke with 3 people (non-clients—two are now new clients) In 2025: Cara,63, Told me she spend $3156 on Dating last year with Zero results Thomas, a good looking doctor age 67, spent over $5,000 Michael, age 58, accomplished architect won the contest at over $7,000 ugh, ick, Lots of $$$ Me: WHAT??? What are you doing? Who is giving you advice? Ba

By Andrea McGinty Founder, It’s Just Lunch & 33000Dates.com 33,000+ Dates Curated | 10,000+ Marriages | 65% Success Rate | Dating Strategist #1 Dating Expert and Dating Coach according to Oprah | Spring/Summer dating season has arrived. The birds are flirting. The patios are open. The apps are buzzing. And singles everywhere are staring into the digital abyss asking the same question UFO researchers have asked for decades: Is there intelligent life out there? After 30+ years

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By Andrea McGinty Founder, It’s Just Lunch & 33000Dates.com 33,000+ Dates Curated | 10,000+ Marriages | 65% Success Rate | | #1 Dating Expert and Dating Coach according to Oprah | Spring dating season has arrived. The birds are flirting. The patios are open. The apps are buzzing. And singles everywhere are staring into the digital abyss asking the same question UFO researchers have asked for decades: Is there intelligent life out there? After 30+ years in dating, I can confir

By Andrea McGinty |Founder, It’s Just Lunch & 33000Dates.com| 33,000+ Dates Curated | 10,000+ Marriages | Featured on Oprah, The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, People & more Spring dating season is here. The birds are flirting. The patios are open. The linen shirts are making questionable early appearances. And somewhere, a perfectly attractive, successful single person is saying: “I’ll start dating when I lose five pounds / feel less busy / update my photos / recov

Let’s be honest for a second. You’ve done a lot right: Career ✅ Health ✅ Financial stability ✅ And yet… Your dating life? Inconsistent at best. Here’s what I see after 30+ years and 33,000+ first dates: Smart people treat dating like a side hobby and expect it to deliver a life-changing result. It doesn’t work that way. My friend Arthur Brooks has been saying this. I've been saying this for at least 20 of 30+ years of experience....especially about longevity of life related

Let’s be blunt: If your entire dating plan consists of you, your couch, and your thumb, you do not have a dating strategy. You have finger strength . Yes, online dating matters. Of course it does. I built a career in this business before Google was a verb and before dating apps were an itch in a developer’s brain. I’ve curated over 33,000 dates and witnessed 10,000 marriages . I know the tech works. But it is not the be-all, end-all. It’s an ingredient, not the whole dam

Why over-screening everyone is killing your love life 1. You’re treating every date like a potential threat to national security. He’s five minutes late? Threat. She used one emoji too many? Threat. He mentioned his ex in passing? Full body scan. Calm down, Homeland Security. Dating is supposed to be discernment, not a federal investigation. If you walk into every date assuming danger, deception, or disaster, you are not protecting your heart — you are blockading it. 2. You’r

I’m never bored with what I do. Why? Because people are endlessly fascinating — especially when it comes to dating. I’ve always said there’s an inverse correlation between high intelligence and dumb dating. After more than 30 years as a dating expert, matchmaker, and coach — and after seeing more than 33,000 dates happen (yes, really) — I can tell you this: smart, accomplished people make some very avoidable mistakes. Here are five of the biggest. 1. Don’t overshare. Not on

tolstoy and dating Tolstoy figured out in the 1800s what most daters over 50 still don’t get. Leo Tolstoy walked away from wealth, fame, and intellectual society to live simply among peasants. Why? Because he realized something uncomfortable: “My life came to a standstill… I felt that what I had been living for no longer existed.” Most people aren’t living consciously. They’re just repeating patterns. Sound familiar? After arranging over 33,000 first dates, I can tell you thi

After facilitating 33,000 first dates , I’ve noticed something wildly strange. Brilliant people — CEOs, investors, founders, surgeons — suddenly abandon every business principle they believe in the moment romance enters the room. In business you analyze risk. You evaluate long-term upside. You look at past performance. In dating? People invest their entire emotional portfolio based on vibes and a nice smile. If dating worked like a boardroom, here are a few things that wou

I know this is a slightly unhinged thing to post… but I have truly never encountered one this spectacularly self-sabotaging. If dating profiles were carry-on luggage, some roll out looking normal… and some arrive duct-taped, leaking emotional baggage, and labeled “HANDLE WITH CAUTION.” Today’s post is a little game I’m calling Red Flag Waldo —because what I found on a real dating site (yes, a real profile ) is basically a scavenger hunt of warning signs. And here’s the twist

I don’t buy into Valentine’s Day. Never have. Never will. And not because I’m a grinch. I love love. I sell love for a living. I'm basically the Costco of relationships: big selection, better standards, fewer regrets. But Valentine’s Day? It’s… kind of icky. It’s a manmade holiday. (hello Hallmark and planes flying in roses from South America) Oh—before I go all-in here… I’ve got a gift for you . 🎁 I’m sending my Amazon bestselling book ( 2nd Acts: Winning Strategies for Da

I like football and I love love, but let’s be real: The Super Bowl isn’t won on "vibes," and neither is your life. Football has a scoreboard; your dating life has a group chat full of excuses. It’s time to stop manifesting and start coaching. End the "Preseason" Era. If you’ve been "just seeing what’s out there" since 2019, that’s not practice—it’s avoidance. Put on a jersey or get off the field. Draft for the Season, Not the Highlights. Profiles are highlight reels; marr

Yes—these are damaging.“Dangerous” might sound dramatic… but after 30+ years of being a dating coach and matchmaker (and no, that does not make me old—thank you very much), I can tell you one thing with confidence: Attitude drives outcomes. In business. In golf. In my 20-year-old daughter’s film-school dreams that her film is headed to Sundance (according to her… and honestly I love that confidence).And especially in dating. So let’s clear out the beliefs that quietly ruin

Ok, yes — I’ve had years to think about this… 30 , to be precise, as a dating coach and matchmaker. So can you settle for 2 or 3 out of the 4 standards ? Nope. Because here’s the problem: no one really teaches us how to choose a life partner. Most of us are winging it based on what we saw growing up, what our friends do, or whatever rom-com nonsense we accidentally absorbed on Netflix. But there are standards. And there is absolutely no reason to settle . So today’s a short

The 2nd Act Dating Scorecard (below) Because we’re not freelancing our love life anymore. Hey, what a way to start a Monday, right? Did I mention free book? See bottom, after quiz! How to use it: Rate each line 0–5 0 = Nope • 1–2 = Sometimes • 3 = Mostly • 4 = Consistently • 5 = My standard (welcome to the penthouse) Total possible: 60 A) Clarity & Standards (0–15) I’m crystal clear on what I want (relationship style, lifestyle, location, values). 0 1 2 3 4 5 I know