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Sarah*: How she met the one online

Ten unedited questions from Sarah* for my bi-monthly 10 Question Column (*name changed)

Andrea: I loved talking to Sarah---even when we'd hit a wall with men we found online. She's a 61-year-old attorney and judge, widowed. What stood out about having Sarah as a client?

a. She never gave up---we'd have serious talks during our sessions but often interspersed with laughter (we did laugh a lot!)

b. It's all about timing---as you will see below. It's got to be the right person at the right time.

c. She was so open---never discounted anyone immediately. (Except Peter who she went out with several times and who was constantly in a bad mood!)

Photo of Sarah and Jerry In New Orleans


  1. What was it like to be single after being married?

 I was married for almost 24 years and at age 55 my husband passed away very suddenly.  To say it was difficult is an understatement and it took a couple of years for me to even think about dating. 

  1. What made you decide to call a dating coach?

I had been on a couple of different dating sites and was not meeting the right people, so I read about what Andrea does with her business and decided that the help would be great for me. After our initial phone call I was convinced that she could help me find the right person. 

  1. How many dates did you go on in the last 3-5 years and any funny or weird stories?  Did you ever want to give up on dating or online dating?

I went on a lot of first dates that is for sure.  I had a couple of short dating relationships and after each of those ended, I took some time off from dating.  I was just about to let my subscription expire and give up when I reconnected with a guy I had been on a few dates about a year before. 

  1. How did you meet Jerry?

Jerry & I had gone on about 3 dates a year ago and we kind of just drifted apart.  He reached out to me about 3 months ago right around the time of my daughter’s wedding.  He lives about an hour away from me and we chatted over the phone and text messages getting reacquainted for a couple of weeks.  To be honest, I was a bit nervous about getting involved with him again but decided it was worth a try and I am so glad that I did.  Our first time seeing each other, I think we both knew there was a spark between us!  Our first date, he came to my house and we hung out by my pool and talked for hours!  

  1. Did you know he was the “one” on your first date?  Was there instant chemistry? 

I didn’t know on the first date for sure but there was definitely chemistry.  He is so easy to be with and talk to and has a great sense of humor

  1. What did you like about him?  How did that differ from what you thought you were looking for?

Jerry is very family oriented and we also have a lot in common professionally, he is a retired police officer and I am a retired prosecutor.  He is also very respectful of my new career in the judiciary.  He is different but also a lot of what I was looking for — honest, good sense of humor, likes sports (like me) and he’s  very sweet and protective of me when we are walking around and out doing things. We just recently took a trip to New Orleans and It was so sweet how he looked out for me and held my hand. 

  1. How did Andrea as a dating coach help you?

Andrea helped me with my confidence in dating and also gave me a lot of great advice on how to setup my profile, what kinds of things to say when I reach out to a potential date and helping me pick out the right photos.  

  1. What advice would you give other men and women about online dating?

I would say to hang in there, someone is out there for you.  But also, do not settle for less than you deserve. 


  1.  When did you know for sure he was the one?

Not sure how to describe how I knew Jerry was the one for me I just did.    After our first date, we planned for me to go to his house and we spent the weekend together.  We went to a festival and he showed me around his city.  Now, we usually spend weekends together and recently took our first trip.  We spent 3 days in New Orleans and we travelled so well together.  We talk or FaceTime on the phone every day.  We always text good night and good morning to each other. We talk about long-term plans for travel and spending time together.  He is fully retired, but I still work and he is really good about making time for me around my work schedule. 

  1. Did you share with others (friends, family) that you were trying online dating or using a coach?   Were they positive or negative? 

Some of my friends knew and they have been very supportive.  I am very lucky to have close friends and family who have been there for me!

Andrea: Sarah, I am so happy for you and Jerry! This is why I do what I do.


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