Everywhere I look, it’s a list of gift-giving ideas from Buzzfeed to Oprah! Recently I posted a blog from a 38-year-old male client who is the CEO of a Fortune 100 company on what men look for on a first date. So, in the holiday spirit I went back to my friend and asked him about the gift giving season and his feelings – and he told me he was answering for every guy he knows too!
So, here’s some of his thoughts on online dating, gift giving and the holidays . . .
Don’t Send a Man a Gift at Work
It doesn’t make a difference what kind of gift (although flowers are the worst) of how long you’ve been dating. Few men like to receive gifts at work. Men are not accustomed to receiving gifts at work – when they do, people ask lots of questions. It forces him to explain who sent them, what his relationship is with the person who sent the gift, etc. And many men just aren’t comfortable answering these questions.
Don’t Drop Hints About Your Upcoming Birthday or Holiday
Guess what? If a man is interested in the woman he is dating, he knows when her birthday is and when the holidays are without any reminders. Hinting about holidays (and what she may consider to be a good gift---a Cartier bracelet is a, um, huge turn-off) makes a women seem insecure, materialistic and more.
If You Just Started Dating, Don’t Go Overboard with Gifts
A woman should think of gift-giving for the new man in her personal life the same way she might a new client in her professional life. For example, if a woman just landed a new client in early December, would she send that client an extravagant gift for the holidays? Of course not! Sending an expensive gift to a new client sends the client a signal that the client is far too important to her career.
Of course, a small gift is thoughtful. And a woman should act the same way toward a man she just met from online dating. Spending too much on a man she just met sends a signal to that man that he is far too important in her life. It will make him uncomfortable. But a small, thoughtful gift is appropriate and appreciated.
See our upcoming blog on the gift giving timeline for dating!