Red Flag Dating IQ Test

I know this is a slightly unhinged thing to post… but I have truly never encountered one this spectacularly self-sabotaging.

 If dating profiles were carry-on luggage, some roll out looking normal… and some arrive duct-taped, leaking emotional baggage, and labeled “HANDLE WITH CAUTION.”

Today’s post is a little game I’m calling Red Flag Waldo—because what I found on a real dating site (yes, a real profile) is basically a scavenger hunt of warning signs.

And here’s the twist: I’m making it a contest. 

Your mission:

 Find the first 5 red flags you see.

No overthinking. No “maybe he meant…” excuses. Just… read it like you’re screening for your future partner.

(Prize details at the end. 😉)  You’ll be happy.

The Real Profile (Verbatim)

Yes, this is real. No, I didn’t write it. I just… stumbled upon it while searching for a match for a client and had to pick my jaw up off the floor.

Oh, feel free to skip parts of the purple part below so your coffee does not get cold:

I'm 66, not 61. I asked Match.com to fix that, but what a pain to do it. Anyway, I'm new to this. I am financially secure, retired and widowed. I've had many pets, none now, but will stop traffic for any animal. I've worked in animal rescue places and have mucked stalls for handicapped horses. I am active and very fit.. We did some ballroom dancing, so if you're inclined or interested I'm in. If you say you're my lady then I will be your man and a one woman man only. I will support you, encourage you, pamper you and romance you and protect you all at levels that fulfill your happiest dreams. No one is perfect and I don't expect others to be. However, I've read a lot of profiles, thoroughly, looked at pictures, spoken with or chatted with let's just say several ladies, and so far, I'm disappointed in the heart and soul and values of most of them. It appears to be the fault of high society, and probably more specifically so called "higher" education. Many are putting emphasis on TRAVEL or FINE DINING or boating or bling bling or bla bla. Yes I can accommodate all those things and will definitely do so when we're established as at least "dating," but making that a prerequisite for a meeting or a relationship is shallow to me. Agree, ladies should be screening, but don't lose your soul. So let's try this.

LET ME HELP YOU WITH ME: If any ladies who grew up poor, and are perhaps Southern Bells from Fl, Ky, Tn, AL, Ga, La, Tx, SC, NC, but not necessarily from them, I just love the accents, and you haven't forgotten the struggles of let's say digging in garbage cans for food or living under a bridge when you were homeless and are genuinely kind hearted and are simply looking for a nice, quiet time together or a nice time together at a nice venue then I'd love to hear from you. You angels go to the front of the line. If you're a conniving liar or thief or after a free meal, or can't give a straight answer or think you're having fun manipulating other people, or are "speed dater" or a scammer or if you think you're smarter than others by taking psych courses on YouTube, or believe in Climate Change, or are someone whose pictures can't fit on the screen because you let yourself go so much through gluttony and then blaming all of your problems on others, or on drugs like crack or meth, or a drunken bed hopping risk taker, or trying to juggle a bunch of different guys on your key chain AFTER engaging with someone , then please don't contact me, instead go to Ashley Madison or Friend Finder or one of those other disingenuous and dangerous sites for careless bed hoppers... For the bling chasers, here's a hint, remember Mr. Walton of WalMart. He would drive only the oldest, most beat up truck around town. And oh, if you insist on talking to me on the phone before we meet, which is a red flag for spoofers and exploiters, then fine, I'd love to speak with you. You provide your number to me and I'll call you.

Okay—Now It’s Your Turn (Prize Reveal 🎁)

Email me your first 5 red flags from his profile (bullets are perfect).

🎁 The first FIVE people to email me back will get a copy of my Amazon bestselling book shipped today.

Subject line: RED FLAG WALDO

Include: your name + mailing address + age  (no P.O. boxes—Amazon tends to be weird about those).

Send to 33kdates@gmail.com

And yes—this profile is real. Which is exactly why this little game might be the most useful dating IQ test you take all week. 😉

I counted 22 red flags. Twenty-two. That’s not a profile—that’s a parade. But you only need to tell me 5..or you can go for it!

Email me yours and I’ll send you my full list plus how I would’ve rewritten his bio to sound like a sane, appealing adult.

And I know this is a slightly unhinged thing to post… but I have truly never encountered one this spectacularly self-sabotaging

Have fun...and my East Coast clients: stay warm and safe...

XX

Andrea McGinty Dating Strategist