As a guest on two national podcasts this week, both interviewers mentioned interesting questions from singles listening live. I would like to address these as they can affect a positive dating experience…and fun online.
1. Fear
Online dating has been around since the 1990’s (as long I have as an online dating consultant and in the dating business!). Prior to this in the early 90’s, I had founded It’s Just Lunch, a matchmaking service that went global. I remember in the early days of IJL the fear clients expressed about having their photos online and reticence at trying online dating. In this era, I would say their reluctance was well founded.
But not anymore! With the explosion of online dating in the 2010’s and more safety measures in place, plus the popularity of social media, this became less worrisome to singles. C’mon, you have used Instagram, Facebook, Twitter or others. With connection, we have given up a bit of privacy. But we are much more astute now about the tech world.
2. Wrong Site
Potential single clients take my dating quiz daily at 33000Dates.com----and I personally score it! What I frequently see is that they are on the absolute wrong dating site for what they are looking for---both demographically and geographically! Your friend in NYC met her fiancée on Coffee Meets Bagel---but you live in Jackson Hole, ding! Wrong site for you as CMB is not well populated in Wyoming!
3. Bad Photos
Do you think that one pixelated photo of you where you’ve edited out your ex-girlfriend is going to fly? Uh-uh. We all know you cut someone out---plus it says you really do not care that much and are not that serious about a relationship or dating online. Same with selfies, guys. Not trying to pick on you—but let’s raise the bar a little! I promise it will pay off for you.
4. No Profile/No Info about you
A picture paints a thousand words, true. But if there is nothing to read about you and your interests, it’s a non-starter. Is it that you don’t know what to say or you can’t tap out a few interesting random facts about you? No, it need not be a novella---a short paragraph or bullet points will do. Always spell check it though.
5. Free Membership
One caller yesterday on a podcast told me about her lack of dates and responses online. Nosy me, I immediately asked which program through what site she had signed up for. The free one. No, no, no! Obviously, these online dating giants make money somehow---through your membership fees. A free membership is nothing more than a marketing ploy to get you to join by dangling potential singles in your email---however, generally you can’t see their face or info. A total time waster!
It becomes much easier when you have help navigating the online dating game. The four most important items are: the right site, great photos, opening line of your profile and your messaging style! More on that in my next article.
As we approach the holidays, I have my Annual Gift for you. 20% off my services---but it will not last long! Sign up today and we can start you dating next week…. or sign up today and we can start you in January!
Love to you all and happy dating! Andrea McGinty